*Every time you call same-sex marriage 'gay marriage' a bisexual loses their wings. However, spouse covers same-sex, and different-sex marriages of cis, binary trans and non-binary trans people of all sexes, and so can be used as a catch-all. Non-binary identifications vary widely, and so can only really be considered on a case-by-case basis. So, assuming either a cissexual partner, or a partner that identifies as either of the binary of man or woman, then you call them a wife if they are a woman and a husband if they are a man. The word husband meant the man who is the master of a household, but this has moved to having less hierarchical implications a long time ago not just with the rise of the Women's Movement in the last century, though that obviously had massively increased the changes in how we consider the term.† As such, it means the man one is married to. In the context of a marriage, then whether same-sex or different-sex* it means the woman one is married to, and always has done.
